Saturday, September 27, 2008

Ground effect vehicles

I'm sure all the nerds and geeks out there know what these are, but in case you're neither, here is a quick explanation: An ekranoplan is a wing-in-ground-effect vehicle that flies on a cushion of air created by its wings where as a hovercraft is a ground effect vehicle that hovers on a cushion of air contained underneath the vehicle, usually by means of a big bag, termed a skirt, or envolope.


The first Ground Effect Vehicle was probably the Versuchsgleitboot (see images above) designed by an Austrian called Dagobert Müller von Thomamühl, and built by the Imperial Austro Hungarian Navy in 1915. It was 13 metres long, displaced 6½ tons and had 5 aero engines. Four to push it forwards and one to blow warm air under the hull. It was designed to be a fast torpedo attack boat specialising in anti submarine operations whose reduced water resistance gave it a top speed of over 32 knots. Unlike later hovercraft designs with their inflatable envolopes, the Versuchsgleitboot had rigid sides which meant it was a sort of half way design between the Hovercraft and Ram Wing Vehicles.


In 1931, a Finnish aero engineer named Toivo J. Kaario began to experiment with air cushion vehicles that operated by means of air trapped below the vehicle in an inflatable envolope. (technically the air cushion is not a bag as it is open underneath). Kaario's designs were true Ground Effect Vehicles, but as is often the case in Scandinavia, there was no funding available and nothing more came of Kaario's work. It took no lesser a person than Konstantin Tsiolkovsky to actually describe what was going on which he did in a book entitled Air Resistance and the Express Train. (If your not aware of Tsiolkovsky then look him up, the guy was a visionary genius!).

A Soviet engineer named Vladimir Levkov then took up the air cushion concept and over the course of the 1930's built numerous prototypes, all naturally geared towards military applications. Levkov's supporters like to claim he is the inventor of the hovercraft but even if we suppose that Müller von Thomamühl and Kaario had not already built working air-cushion designs, there is no way to argue that Levkov was unaware of Tsiolkovsky's book which was published in 1927 and readily available to Levkov.


Regardless of Levkov's status in the pantheon of invention, his pioneering credentials remain intact. One of Levkov's air-cushion designs designated the L-5 fast attack boat (see image above), achieved a speed of 70 knots. Alas for Levkov, the reality of the Second World War meant his designs were set aside for more practical military hardware and his research was shelved.


In 1953 a British engineer named Christopher Cockerall began to build air cushion prototypes using balsa wood, vacum cleaners and hair dryers. Cockerall eventually sold many of his personal possessions in order to finance his designs, and in 1959 his efforts paid off when he launched his SRN1 prototype (See image above). Capable of carrying four men it crossed the English channel to wide spread public enthusiasm. The golden age of British hovercraft was born. Cockerall's design, heralded as the first hovercraft by its British supporters, used a new method of injecting air into an inflatable envolope (this is the most common type of hovercraft today) which gave the vehicle a true All Terrain capability.

And it has to be added, there is no vehicle that can operate on all terrains better than the hovercraft.



Several variants of Cockerall's design were built, including the famous SRN5 'Mountbatten' class (see image above), and the Vickers Armstrong VA-3. I'm not sure which type they were but I regularly saw two or three commercial hovercraft in my childhood, on the beach in Southport (Merseyside, UK) from where they ferried people to Ireland and the Isle of Man. These black, red and white monstrous vehicles were truly amazing to behold, most especially when they were on the move. (Watch the video below to get an idea of what I mean). Their bags would be inflated and bulging out and their props made a most astounding noise. A friend who once travelled aboard one to France described the journey as 'very bouncy and very noisy', and told how drinking from a cup of coffee was practically impossible due to the intense vibrations.

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Noisy bugger!
Note how the rotors turn to steer the hovercraft


The SRN4 was built by BHC who also built two military versions of the Cockerall design, the SRN5 & 6. These saw action in Vietnam under the USN designation of PACV (Patrol Air Cushion Vehicle).

Today there are numerous countries still operating hovercraft, both militarily and commercially. Naturally the Russians have built the worlds largest Ground Effect Vehicle, the Zubr class amphibian assault craft which is a hybrid of the Cockerall and Levkov designs. Zubr's can carry up to 140 soldiers or three main battle tanks.



Ram Wing Vehicles and the Ekranoplan

The first Ram Wing, or Wing-in-Ground-Effect Vehicles were apparently designed in Scandinavia during the late 1930's. Not much is written about these and I haven't been able to find anything about their technical ability or even who made them, they could have been Kaario or they could have been some one else. My search for further information on early Scandinavian Ram Wing vehicles has proven fruitless. At the time they were almost certainly experimental, and the developers appear to have discarded their research for unknown reasons.


Not to scale, A is far bigger than B & C

After the war the German designer Alexander Lippisch and the Soviet designer Rostislav Alexeiev both took up the idea of Wing-in-Ground-Effect Vehicles, independently of each other. Lippisch built various designs centred around the concept of the high pressure Ram Wing (B), usually with endplates fitted to the wings in order to enhance ground effect. A Ram Wing is a wing designed to push through the air in such a way as to create a high pressure cushion of air beneath the vehicle. Once the vehicle is moving at speed, it rests upon this 'air cushion'.

As wings also give lift, Ram Wing Vehicles only have small stubby wings to prevent them from taking off. A tail plane is also essential to provide stability but unlike a conventional aircraft the tail plane on a Ram Wing Vehicle has to be an integral part of the original design as the size and shape of the tail will determine whether or not the Ram Wing Vehicle functions. If the tail is the wrong shape then the whole design fails.
Propulsion is provided by aero engines, either pushing or pulling in the same manner as with an aircraft.

X-114

To say Alexander Lippisch was big on wings is something of an understatement. In his time he built flying wing gliders, worked for Zeppelin and designed the world's first operational rocket fighter, the infamous Me-163. When Lippisch turned his attention to the Ram Wing concept he developed the reverse delta wing design (as seen on the x-114 above) which provides a great deal of stability due to the tapering rear wing edges. One of the advantages of the reverse delta wing design is it allows for a smaller tail plane, though as you can see, its still quite a big tail.

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Rostislav Alexeiev's Ekranoplan designs (A) also have Ram Wings to create a high pressure air cushion but they differ in that they have their engines mounted to the front of the wings and angled to provide additional airflow towards the Ram Wings. This makes them stronger and faster, and subsequently the Soviet Union built some of the largest ground effect vehicles (see videos above). Alexeiev employed more conventional square shaped wings, so his ekranoplans have enormous tail planes.

The Soviets really went to town with Ekranoplan development. During the cold war they were flying these secretive vehicles back and forth on the Black Sea and the CIA would get glimpses of them and wonder what the hell they were. Naturally they were developed as military transport, or high speed missile battery's, but despite being largely successful in creating these vehicles, the Soviets never really managed to field them with any great degree of success. Dimitriy Ustinov supported the concept as Minister for Defence of the USSR but economics had the final say. 120 Ekranoplans were originally planned for, but in reality only 3 A-90's and 1 LUN class were built.

The LUN class Ekronplan (see image above) is worth its own paragraph. This was a truly monstrous vehicle with an overall length of 74 metres making it one of the largest aircraft ever built. It had eight Kuznetsov turbojet engines and the sole example built was equipped for anti submarine warfare with six fixed-elevation SS-N-22 Sunburn anti-ship missile launchers.

One final German designed Ram Wing Vehicle remains, the Jorg IV 'Skimmerfoil' (C) has two sets of Ram Wings (fore and aft) and does away with the tail plane. This is known as a tandem design and gives good stability with a strong ground effect.

There are many types of Ram Wing aircraft built today, but they remain small in scale and confined to the entertainment or private sectors.

Boeing has some plans to build a giant Ram Wing vehicle, known as the Pelican, but as yet this monster aircraft (twice the size of an Antonov-224) remains a concept. Not to be outdone, Russia has its own conceptual super lifter ground effect lifter, the Beriev Be-2500. Naturally the Russian design is twice the size of the American.


edited to add:

Heres serendipty in action!

James May looks at a modern Russian Ekranoplan

BBC article on fifty years of the Hovercraft

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Zhai Zhigang goes for a walk


I'm somewhat ambiguous about this achievement. It seems to be a big thing for communist regimes, and I suppose it is impressive from a purely technical point of view, but its a bit disapointing that the countries that reached this point half a century ago, haven't gotten much further. Perhaps, with a bit of luck, China's endeavour will herald a new age of global space cooperation that will see humanity reach ever more impressive goals. I'm not holding my breath though. If it takes as long as this just for other countries to catch up, I'll be dead before anything really impressive happens. If it happens at all.

Friday, September 26, 2008

'The Purity of Blood' and 'The Sun over Breda'



By Arturo Pérez-Reverte

I'll take these two as one, as they follow each other. 'The Purity of Blood' opens with the beginings of a murder mystery (the blurb on the back of the book echoes this), but within a few pages it deviates from this promising beginning and become a somewhat boring account of the fate of Captain Altriste's companion, Inigo Balboa after he is captured by the Spanish Inquisition (whom no body expects) and tortured for various reasons.

The book is basically an unsatisfactory examination of what it meant to be Jewish in 17th century Spain. Unsatisfying since this examination comes at the expense of the eagerly anticipated mystery, the murder being solved along the way almost as an after thought. (One starts to understand why the film was so horribly edited).

'The Sun over Breda' take place once Alatriste and Balboa have fled Spain to fight in the Nederlands, and is a disjointed account of the Spanish army's gradual defeat told through the eyes of Inigo Balboa. Like 'The Purity of Blood', this novel appears to be coaching history in terms of our contemporary age and Pérez-Reverte seems to be drawing dubious parrallels between the Thirty Years War, the First World War and even Vietnam. I can't decide if he's taking the piss or if he's got a point. Sometimes it seems like he knows what he's talking about, but other times it reads as if he's just referencing things he saw as a war correspondent.

What ever else he is up to, the continued repetion and monotonous focus on Inigo Balboa is wearing me down, and to be frank, I can't be bothered to read the later books. The first book had a plot, a point and an interesting main character, but Captain Alatriste takes a back seat as Inigo Balboa (the narrator) grows older, and any notion of a plot evaporates as Pérez-Reverte/Balboa repeats himself again and again, ignoring any notion of story telling in favour of a long and dull account of Inigo Balboa's protracted love/hate relationship with the woman he loves.

Pérez-Reverte is something of an expert on Alexandre Dumas, so he likes to drop names and make connections between Dumas's work and his own. It can be amusing to spot these connections as they appear, but not amusing enough, alas. By the time I finished 'The Sun over Breda', I had lost all interest in the daring adventures of Captain Alatriste and his monomaniac side kick.

The Battle of Algiers

Dir: Gillo Pontecorvo

This is a black and white film, made in 1966 ( a mere 4 years after Algerian independence) about the Algerian nationalist and Muslim terrorist group FLN and the extreme measures France undertook to combat them. Pontecorvo was a die hard communist, and the film certainly bears a strong influence of this. There are signs that some semblence of equilibrium has been aimed for, but largely I found the film to be heavily biased.

According to IMDb, In an obituary for Pontecorvo, Reuters observed that the film, which depicted brutality against civilians by both sides in Algeria's war for independence from France in the 1950s, was shown to Pentagon officers and civilian experts after the U.S. invasion of Iraq in 2003. The invitation to the screening, the wire service recounted, read, "How to win a battle against terrorism and lose the war of ideas."

Thats a bit rich if you ask me. Thats the sort of thing one expects people working at the Pentagon to be well aware of from the first day they signed on.

I found the film to be rather dated. Most of its thesis is common knowledge in our online age and its imagery isn't all that shocking. Pontecorvo employs a lot of deep contrasts which give the film a 'noir look', but the story fails to establish the mystery of a noir. No doubt this is because we the viewers are already aware that France is doomed to lose Algeria when the film begins. It was most notable that whilst he retained certain religious elements of the uprising, Pontecorvo toned down the wider aspects of Algeria's jihad.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Gloria!

Be warned ye sensitive of heart, Jim Morrison didn't have too many inhibitions!



Todays featured moif favourite. This one always gets me going. I love the bit where Morrison kicks off with 'now that we know each other a little bit better'. Cracks me up every time.

The Doors are so dated now, but still so real. Its like listening to a soundtrack for the Vietnam war. All you need is footage of the B52's to make a perfect counter point to Morrison's blunt disregard for convention.

"Bare læs det ud!"

And how do you follow something that good? Well it can be done, and done well. Here is another moif fav proving that America is far cooler than most other countries ('cause I'd love to hear the Iranian band which can go toe-to-toe with RATM).



They're a bunch of communist provo's, but I don't care. No one ever had a better sound!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Monday, September 15, 2008

Ladies and gentlemen, please don your tinfoil hats


Beside the above picture, the head line on the BBC main news page reads 'Lehman bros files for bancrupcy'. So far so good... but wait a second.. that guy in the red T shirt is wearing the Weyland Yutani logo! ..and we all know what those guys get up to!

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Autogyro's, gyrodyne's and helicogyre's


Autogyro's

If you know what an autogyro is, then your probably seeing something akin to the above image in your head (don't you just love how the illustrator has given Bond the classic Bond pose even though he's cleary flying, whilst being shot at, firing his own machine gun and launching two missiles). The aircraft in that picture is the classic British 'Wallis design' of the 1960's. More about that later.

Autogyro's, gyrocopter's and helicogyro's are all aircraft which use rotor blades to stay up in the air, but which aren't helicopters (in other words they usually can't hover or take off vertically).

The most simple difference between a gyrocopter and a helicopter is helicopters have powered rotors and autogyro's don't. Autogyro's work by means of air passing over the rotor blades, making them spin and in return giving the aircraft lift. Aeroplanes use their wings for the same purpose. Lift is what keeps air craft in the air. The autogyro was invented in 1923 by the Spanish aero-engineer and pioneer of flight; Juan de la Cierva who had been trying to build a three engined bomber for the Spanish military, but who found to his dismay that it kept stalling (in other words the aeroplane lost lift). In order to deal with this, Cierva turned to some designs he'd been playing with the year before, and in 1923 he managed to build the worlds first functioning autogyro, the C-4 (thats it in the picture below taking off for the first time in 1923). When the engine of the C-4 stalled, as engines were also wont to do quite often in those days, the C-4 was still held aloft by the 'autogyration' of its rotors, and still had sufficient lift to glide safely down to the ground with ease.


Cierva continued to build autogyro's, spending all his remaining money on the next prototype, the C-5, and then getting a grant from the Spanish military for the C-6. These aircraft were still experimental though and real funding was needed. A Scottish industrialist named James G. Weir stepped up and together they founded the Cierva Autogiro Company, in England. Cierva, now with real funding started producing more and more sophisticated aircraft, improving his designs one after the other. The British government got interested as did an American industrialist named Harold F. Pitcairn who set up his own licensed manufacture of autogyro's in the USA. Focke-Wulf of Germany were also very interested and were granted a license to manufacture their own variant and the Third Reich was eager to assist other aero-designers to build new and interesting aircraft also.

In 1929, Cierva tested the C-19, by far his most advanced model as it could start its rotor spinning prior to take off (thus giving the C-19 the ability to take off on a shorter run way). Up until this point, Cierva had been building his autogyro's as if they were fixed wing air craft and relying on control surfaces to steer the vehicle. This meant, at low speed the pilots lost their ability to control the aircraft as control surfaces require a flow of air in order to function. The slower the speed, the less air flow and the autogyro's become more difficult to control. Cierva solved this problem by developing a direct control rotor hub that allowed the rotors to be individually tilted and thus made the rotor the primary method of steering as opposed to control surfaces on wings. Since the rotor was always turning (thanks to autogyration) this mean the aircraft could now be steered at very slow speeds and thus the pilots wouldn't find themselves losing control as they came into a slow landing.

A C8 above Bryn Athyn Cathedral

What this meant in practical terms was, the autogyro could take off and land on extremelly short air strips thus giving the autogyro a decided advantage over fixed wing aircraft. They still couldn't take off and land vertically, like helicopters can, but in the 1930's helicopters were still a decade away from stealing the show and autogyro's were in their golden age.

Like so much of that era, it all came to tears in 1939. The Second World War eventually did away with the autogyro as a practical aircraft. People came to see them as clumsy, inefficient and just not worth the bother. I get the feeling that a lot of people were influenced by the sleek and sexy designs of fixed wing aircraft and so these were developd to a far greater degree. Fixed wing aircraft also had fewer moving parts and were more practial to boot. Fixed wing aircraft production sealed the fate of Cierva's designs, relagating them to the cheap seats and Cierva himself was killed in a plane crash in 1936 thus ending his innovation. The only significant autogyro design to come from the Second World War was the unpowered German Fa-330, designed to be towed by a U boat and used as a look out post (I bet that was a cold duty). The FA-330 was designed to be broken down and stowed inside the U boat so it was very small and easily taken apart (see below). Its fascinating to watch given that the only thing keeping the Fa-330 up in the air is the forward motion of the U boat.



Fl-184

The Japanese had a variant of the same idea and the British used their autogyro's to calibrate their coastal radar defences, but on the whole the autogyro was eclipsed by other aircraft designs and became an obscure curiosity. The Germans had played about with numerous designs, including the Fl-184 anti submarine prototype but after the war was finally finished, things looked bad for future autogyro development. Times had changed and the helicopter had arrived to steal the thunder. That was until a Russian immigrant in the USA named Igor Benson came across an FA-330 and was motivated by its light weight simplicity. Benson designed his own version, the B-5 which was designed to be pulled behind a car, presumably along beaches. Later he added light-weight motors to his designs and finally in the 1950's he had perfected them with the B-8. The USAAF tested the B8 as a possible aircraft escape vehicle under the designation X-25b (which makes it sound very grand) but nothing much came of that.

X-25b

Crew: 1
Dimensions-
Span: 22 ft, 8 in; Length: 11 ft, 3 in; Height: 6 ft, 3 in
Max Speed-
95 MPH
Range-
84 miles
Max Altitude-
15,000 ft
Power Plant-
One McCulloch 4318 piston engine with 72 hp
Weights-
Empty: 247 lbs; Loaded: 550 lbs
If you consider the autogyro's design evolution, you can see how the FA- 330 set the template for the next fifty years. The 'next major design' after the B-8 is the Wallis autogyro (as seen in the James Bond poster at the top of this post) and it has very little innovative difference from its predecessor. Ken Wallis spent a lot of time and effort trying to sell the idea of the Autogyro, as a military reconnaissance platform, but no one was really interested. The Wallis design, like the B-8 is a small, buzzing little thing, eccentric and dangerous to behold. A few attempts at building commercial variants went no where. Wallis's most spectacular successes came from Hollywood, where both James Bond and Mad Max made use of autogyro's, in equally unrealistic fashion.



Gyrodyne's

Fairey Rotodyne

A gyrodyne is a hybrid between the autogyro and the helicopter. Like a helicopter it has a powered rotor, and can subsequently hover and take off and land vertically. At least in theory. In practice the levels of power needed mean gyrodynes have been few and far in number and those that were built, used a run way to take off. The story of the gyrodyne starts in the golden age of the 1930's (of course!) when a German aircraft designer named Anton Flettner got involved in building helicogyro's (see below) and autogyro's. His first practical model was the Fl-184 anti submarine prototype (see above) which crashed and burned in 1936. The Fl-184 and its successor the Fl-185 were based on the autogyro idea of forward propulsion using additional propellers, but unlike Cierva, Flettner powered his rotors, effectively making them into gyrodyne's.

Fl-185

These designs eventually led to the famous Fl-282 Kolibri, which is sometimes considered the first practical helicopter, though technically it is a synchropter as it had two intermeshing rotors.

Dr. James Allan Jamieson Bennett, who had become Chief Engineer of the Cierva Autogiro Company after Cierva's death, took the next step. Bennet took Flettners idea and made a prototype gyrodyne which had a shaft-driven rotor with torque correction and propulsion for translational flight provided by a side-mounted propeller. In other words, it had a second prop to stop it from spinning out of control, just like a helicopter but in this design the second prop also provided forward propulsion. Bennett's concept led to a redefinition of what a gyrodyne was as it acted like a helicopter when landing and taking off, but flew like an aeroplane. The most immediate practical application of this came in 1946, when Bennet's design led to the creatiion of the Fairey FB-1 Gyrodyne (see image below).




Crew: 1
Dimensions-
Span: 15.7m. Length: 7.62m. Height: 3.10m
Max Speed-
225km/h
Power Plant-Alvis Leonides 9-cylinder radial piston engine, 520 hp (388 kW)
Weights-
Empty: 1,633kg. Loaded: 2,177kg.
The FB-1 was never more than a pair of protype's, but they demonstrated a wide range of record breaking capabilities. Enough for a new variation to be built; the jet gyrodyne of 1954, which was a gyrodyne with small jets at the tips of its rotor wings (technically this also makes it a helicogyre)

Events bring us now to the Fairey Rotodyne (see image above). Without a doubt the crowning glory of all western autogyro's, gyrodyne's and helicogyre's. Designed to carry passengers, or as a military cargo carrier, the Rotodyne first flew in 1957. It could land like a helicopter and had the cruising speed of a fixed wing aeroplane. It excelled in trials but was killed due to post war politics which saw American designs take precedence.




Crew: 3 + 40 passengers
Dimensions- Span: 15.7m. Length: 7.62m. Height: 3.10m
Max Speed- 343km/h
Range- 830 km
Power Plant-
4× rotor tip jet burning compressed air/fuelNapier Eland turboprops, 2,800 hp (2,100 kW) each
Weights- Loaded: 15,000kg. Max: 17,000kg
Whilst all this was going in the west, the Soviets were busy with their own, parrallel development. The Kamov Ka-22 was the resulting monster. As far as I am aware, it had no commercial purposes.




Crew: 5
Dimensions- Diameter: 22.5m. Length: 27m.
Max Speed- 350km/h
Range- 830 km
Power Plant-
2 × D-25VK turbo shafts, 4045 kW (5500 hp) eachCapacity: 16,400 kg
Gross weight: 42,500 kg


Helicogyro


A helicogyre is a helicopter or Autogyro which uses small propellers or jets to turn its main rotor. Naturally, as this was very unweildy, such aircraft never got past the design stage, but as the jet gyrodyne, the Hiller Hornet and the Fairey Rotodyne demonstrate, the idea wasn't without some merit.

Some personal designs...

There is no conceivable reason why a large, fully developed autogyro couldn't be designed ...save for costs and practicality. As a consequence of this, I have drawn a couple of my own designs (for my friend Oleg's RPG campaign 'Dog star'). These frivolous twin boom designs are based on numerous pre-existing fixed wing aircraft designs, especially the B-25, the P-38 the OV-10 and the P-61. I doubt they'd actually work, but I like the idea of autogyro's and its interesting to wonder what might have been...

Valkyra is a Dwarven transport autogyro with combat capabilities. She can carry 10 soldiers in her cargo compartment, plus two passengers in her uppermost deck. The crew sit in the primary cock pit and a single gunner/bombadier sits in the nose.

Lightning is a smaller, faster, gyrodyne. It has three engines, two pulling and one in the rear of the fusilage which powers the pushing prop and gives power to the rotor. The idea is, with long range drop tanks, Lightning would be able to cruise to the fight, then discarding its tanks power up the rear propellor and accelerate to combat speeds. It has a crew of two. A pilot in the nose and a navigator/specialist in the rear.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Sept 11th in retrospect


This is the first year the anniversay passed without a feeling of immediacy. It feels as if the event has finally been allowed to pass into history and its easier for me to look back on that day now without instantly recalling the feeling of awe and sadness. I think this feeling is compounded by the feeling that the era of GW Bush is finally coming to an end and also because the threat of al qaeda appears to have been neutered by good intelligence services and a dollop of fortune. The cynic in me wonders if this is because Russia now back as the bad guy and the dark forces of conspiring trans national leaders don't need the al qaeda bogey man any more, but some how I doubt the world is that simple.

How long I wonder before the next big thing happens?

Friday, September 12, 2008

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Oddest book titles

As celebrated every year by Booksellers magazines:

1978: Proceedings of the Second International Workshop on Nude Mice (University of Tokyo Press)
1979: The Madam as Entrepreneur: Career Management in House Prostitution (Transaction Press)
1980: The Joy of Chickens (Prentice Hall)
1981: Last Chance at Love: Terminal Romances
1982: Population and Other Problems (China National Publications)
1983: The Theory of Lengthwise Rolling (MIR)
1984: The Book of Marmalade: Its Antecedents, Its History and Its Role in the World Today (Constable)
1985: Natural Bust Enlargement with Total Power: How to Increase the Other 90% of Your Mind to Increase the Size of Your Breasts (Westwood Publishing Co)
1986: Oral Sadism and the Vegetarian Personality (Brunner/Mazel)
1987: No Award
1988: Versailles: The View From Sweden University of Chicago Press)
1989: How to Shit in the Woods: An Environmentally Sound Approach to a Lost Art (Ten Speed Press)
1990: Lesbian Sadomasochism Safety Manual (Lace Publications)
1991: No Award
1992: How to Avoid Huge Ships (Cornwell Maritime Press)
1993: American Bottom Archaeology (University of Illinois Press)
1994: Highlights in the History of Concrete (British Cement Association)
1995: Reusing Old Graves (Shaw & Son)
1996: Greek Rural Postmen and Their Cancellation Numbers (Hellenic Philatelic Society)
1997: The Joy of Sex: Pocket Edition (Mitchell Beazley)
1998: Development in Dairy Cow Breeding and Management: and New Opportunities to Widen the Uses of Straw (Nuffield Farming Scholarship Trust)
1999: Weeds in a Changing World (British Crop Protection Council)
2000: High Performance Stiffened Structures (Professional Engineering Publishing)
2001: Butterworths Corporate Manslaughter Service (Butterworths)
2002: Living With Crazy Buttocks (Kaz Cooke - Penguin)
2003: The Big Book of Lesbian Horse Stories (Kensington Publishing)
2004: Bombproof Your Horse (J A Allen)
2005: People Who Don't Know They're Dead: How They Attach Themselves to Unsuspecting Bystanders and What to Do About It (Gary Leon Hill - Red Wheel/Weiser Books)
2006: The Stray Shopping Carts of Eastern North America: A Guide to Field Identification (Harry N Abrams)
2007: If You Want Closure In Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs (Simon & Schuster US)

Ever wondered what the oddest title on your book shelf is?

I think mine has to be 'The Sheep look up' by John Brunner (awful book)

Monday, September 08, 2008

Freja: Summer fun

Here's a few more pictures of zerstören for all you long distance Snoos fans who keep asking for them (you know who you are). Kristian took these whilst we were in France.





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Where its at

Here's where I'm at:

I've always loved this track and like how so many people covered it in so many ways.

Here's where Freja's at:

Freja loves the Jaws theme and she likes it loud. When it gets to the climactic bits, she climbs into my lap and says "Freja bange!" (Freja scared) and when the shark attack happens she gets all excited and starts playing at being a shark.

Thursday, September 04, 2008

Barad dûr!

688 metres and climbing. Dubai is building (or rather is buying as the guys actually doing the work are from every where but Dubai) the world's undisputed tallest phallus. I really hope they put a big red light on the top. No doubt they are heading for 700 metres as that would make a nice easy to remember figure. I'd love to go to the top floor and see the view, but I suspect an urban city in a desert might not be all that exciting.

Wednesday, September 03, 2008

Artist of the month: Stephane Halleux

Stephane Halleux is a Belgian sculptor with a thing for grotesque robots made from found objects (the older and more grotesque, the better). I like him because I have a passion for models (except 'doll art' which I loathe), and steam punk models are best of all. This is the sort of thing I always want to start building, but never quite get into... too many Rocketman projects and not enough 'photogenic garbage' floating about in Denmark I guess. I don't have the space or the tools for this sort of thing either (yet).


Of course, I have a hundred excuses why I haven't built stuff like this, but I guess the real reason is, I just don't have the 'artist gene'.
Halluex also has a My Space page if any one wants to drop him a message.